Every successful film with a mildly original gimmick is bound to have people trying to reinvent the wheel so to speak, and King Kong is no exception. Mighty Joe Young was one of earliest highlights, and the movie screens of the 50s would be packed with giant *insert animal here* movies, including the future king of kaiju Gojira. Kong was also subject to the Hollywood Remake Machine a few time, once in 1976 by notorious film producer Dino de Laurentiis and again in 2005 by Peter Jackson, but neither of them reached quite the same heights as the original did back in 1933. Everyone’s favorite ape seemed doomed to remain a touchstone of cinematic history, the subject of so many references and callbacks that his own identity would be subsumed within the miasma of pop culture. People would know of Kong but not about Kong, if that makes any sense.
The future of the stupendous simian seemed bleak, until 2017 saw the Jordan Vogt-Roberts re-imagine the world of the titular ape with Kong: Skull Island. The year is 1973. America is slinking back home after getting its ass kicked by Vietnam, and William Randa of the government agency Monarch is looking to get the government’s checkbook so he can set up an expedition to a place called Skull Island, an isolated spot in the South Pacific so mysterious and deadly that it makes the Bermuda Triangle look like your local supermarket. There’s possibly something useful to mankind on that island, but mostly the government doesn’t want those spoopy Russians to get there first, so they give Randa and his ragtag group of soldiers and civilians the greenlight to fly to Skull Island and start dropping ‘seismic charges’ everywhere. Which turns out to be the dumbest idea in the world, as this draws the attention and the ire of the skyscraper-sized gorilla known as Kong, who proceeds to rip them all a new asshole. With their transportation and most of their personnel destroyed, the surviving members of the crew must make their way to the north of the island to freedom, avoiding the strange, deadly and generally giant fauna that reside there. Things aren’t just that simple in life though, as it turns out and perhaps Kong isn’t the vicious monster that he appears to be at first glance. In fact when the really vicious monsters show up, Kong might be these people’s only chance at survival.
As a film blog that loves to namedrop other movies, the obvious one to drop here is the 2014’s Godzilla by Gareth Edwards. Both films were produced by Legendary Pictures, and whether intentionally or otherwise Skull Island feels like a direct and obvious response to the criticisms that the previous film received. Godzilla was a somber film, a spiritual sequel to Gareth Edwards’ ‘kaiju attack as allegory for natural disaster’ film Monsters, with only a little bit of Godzilla and a whole lot of whoever that one lead actor was supposed to be. Skull Island, by contrast, is dripping with explosions, common action movie tropes and comedic one-liners, packed with names like Tom Hiddleston, John Goodman and Samuel L. Jackson, and is rife with the king of Kongs and a slew of other bizarre beasties. Never once in this film are you left wanting for monsters or monster fight, and you’d be surprised how often that comes up in giant monster movies.
Unfortunately, while Skull Island is a perhaps bit more palatable than Godzilla, it’s in the way that a McDonald’s hamburger is palatable. There are more recognizable characters than Godzilla, in the sense that I remember the names of the main cast, but they’re all the onenote archetypes that you’ve seen in a hundred other things. You’ve got the crazy guy who provides all the jokes, the sexy loner who is obviously the hero, the single female reporter trying to break the big scoop, and a handful of extras to round things out. There’s no hidden complexities here, no twists or turns, just a plain patty, single slice of cheese on a sesame seed bun. Certainly an edible meal, even enjoyable every once in a blue moon, but not by any means an amazing experience.
You can tell this is the case in the cavalier way that violence and death is used in Skull Island, where a bunch of people who may or may not have names or personalities get thrown around like rag dolls by a random CGI creature, which presumably I’m supposed to care about, despite not really being given an adequate reason. Hell even the other characters in the movie barely seem to care when one of them gets knocked off, seeing as they might mention it once before moving on completely. A specific example comes to mind where a character is captured by monster birds and the protagonist decides to give up trying to help him IMMEDIATELY, despite being armed and birds being spooked by gunfire. Apparently the idea of accidentally shooting an acquaintance is worse than letting them get eaten alive, according to Skull Island. Remember that the next time you think about going camping with Jordan Vogt-Roberts.
Of course the gamble here is that you won’t notice the cookie-cutter characters and wanton disregard for human life, and instead focus on the giant gorilla fighting things in beautiful locations to classic rock radio hits. A good bet, because the scenery is indeed beautiful, the hits are classic and the monster encounters are as cool as can be, and for a lot of people that would likely be enough to seal the deal, but for an ol’ curmudgeon like me the whole thing feels a bit off. Kong seems a bit too intelligent in parts, the ‘skullcrawlers’ seem like a unneeded substitute for the dinosaurs from the original film, it was as if they tried to enforce ‘comic bookness’ onto a concept that didn’t really need it. You’ve already sold me on a gorilla the length of several football fields punching stuff, it doesn’t also need to break out improvised weaponry like it’s a hairy Jackie Chan. That’s what they call ‘burying the lead’.
However, I must admit that even a jaded bastard like myself got something of a thrill at Kong going buckwild on some fools, and some of the lore being dropped did get my lore glands a’pumpin’, so I suppose Kong: Skull Island manages to squeak by with a recommendation. This is a textbook modern popcorn movie, something to turn your brain off for a while while you watch the pretty pictures, but plays at something bigger in the hopes of jumping on the franchise train. If that’s the kind of thing you’re looking for, maybe you’re trying to find something Halloween-worthy that you can watch with the kids, then pop this in and have yourselves an evening. Those in the mood for tougher fare will be lifting, but luckily there are plenty of giant monster movies to choose from these days, from Godzilla to Gamera to Pacific Rim. And it’s all thanks to King Kong.
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