Planet of the Apes was an explosive success, thanks in part to the phenomenal make-up work by John Chambers, and two years later we got a sequel, Ted Post’s Beneath the Planet of the Apes. In the film, another group of astronauts, by which I mean not Charlton Heston, crashlands onto a wasteland of a world, a bizarre place where intelligent apes (gorillas, orangutans and chimpanzees to be specific) rules and humans are mindless beasts. This time around however, the astronauts that aren’t Charlton Heston must navigate a world of murderous apes but also a race of psychic mutants who have established their own society within the underground ruins, who aside from worshipping an ICBM are kind of assholes in their own right. At the end of his journey the astronaut who isn’t Charlton Heston already knew the awful truth from a while back, and while this time he’s not the loneliest person in existence, there isn't exactly that much fate left to imagine. Hope he’s not allergic to nukes.
Beneath the Planet of the Apes wasn’t as big of a success as the original film, although they still got a lot of use out of Chambers’ make-up, but apparently the franchise was still big enough to warrant a sequel, which is why one year later we got Don Taylor’s Escape from the Planet of the Apes. In the film, yet another group of astronauts crashland onto a wasteland of a world, only this time the wasteland is known as Los Angeles, and the astronauts are actually intelligent apes (chimpanzees to be specific). As it turns out, right before that whole ‘nuke blowing up the entire planet’ thing, Cornelius, Zira and everyone’s favorite redshirt Dr. Milo managed to squeeze into a half-built spaceship and somehow got shot through the timespace continuum onto 1970s Earth. The world at large is, perhaps understandably, crazy about these wild talking apes from the future, and they instantly get sucked into celebrity status. Attending lavish parties, speaking at women’s club meetings, drinking booze, the whole shebang. Sure, humanity treats them more as fancy props rather than fellow sapient beings with their own unique culture, but what more do you expect from Americans?
The one person who isn’t a fan of apes is Otto Hasslein, your run-of-the-mill German antagonist/scientist who happens to be on speaking terms with the President and the CIA. A man with very vague theories on time travel, Otto is convinced that not only are these apes from a future Earth, but that said apes represent an existential threat to humanity. You can’t let them just walk around free, let alone breed with any other apes, or else we’re going to be looking down the wrong side of the gun in about a couple thousand years. How exactly we get to a world of three distinct ape species when there are only two chimps is left conveniently unsaid. It’s also left unsaid why he doesn’t use this knowledge of the future to help steer man and apekind away from mutually assured destruction, but I guess you can’t bring up predestination paradoxes if you’re planning on the dramatically ironic ending.
The first two Apes films are far from what I would call perfect films. Planet of the Apes was too goofy at various points, an issue with people meddling with Serling’s original script I imagine, and Beneath had an issue with lack of energy, but they both balance it out with the suspense of the stranger in a strange land, against all odds premise. Escape takes the awkward goofiness of the former and the lack of energy from the latter and then forgot about that whole suspense thing. The titular escape is the most dramatic part of the movie, but that comes in at the end, so the rest of the movie is taken up with talking. Minutes upon minutes of people talking to each other. Throw in some weird lounge music and some credits and you’ve got yourself a movie, according to Don Taylor.
Escape having an excess of dialogue wouldn’t be too much of an issue if it were centered around Cornelius and Zira, since these are the characters the audience are familiar with and presumably care about, but it’s not. A lot of people talking about Cornelius and Zira sure, but the apes are almost afterthoughts in their own film, and aside from the opening and ending of the film are mostly relegated to vaguely comedic bits. Why this was the way they went with this is unclear, since Roddy McDowall and Kim Hunter are easily the most charismatic actors in the cast, and most of what they’re given to work with is tone-deaf or just plain stupid. Cornelius and Zira are doctors and academics, and yet they act like they’ve never had to read a damn room in their lives, despite engaging in several acts of deception and subterfuge across two fucking movies. They might not be accustomed to man’s worlds, but I’m pretty sure if I get chained up and put up in front of a council I’m going to figure out now is not the time to act like the Dick Van Dyke Show.
Planet of the Apes movies always have a meaning more than just seeing people in rubber masks walking around, and to me it appears that Escape from the Planet of the Apes is meant to be an allegory for the way countries (especially America) treat undocumented immigrants less as living, breathing people and more as props to push political agendas, as well as establishing the foundation for the inevitable ape-human conflict. Which is a fine plot for a movie, and it’s basically what we get here, but Escape fails to make it compelling. What we should have got was a film dealing with Cornelius and Zira’s culture shock upon entering human society, seeing first-hand the misery we inflict upon ourselves, perhaps starting off as celebrities and then becoming pariahs as they start to question the current order of things, ultimately coming to the conclusion that history will repeat itself because mankind’s vain self-interest will not allow apes to coexist on Earth. Not old white guys talking to each other in various rooms. Hell, even the damn ‘escape’ has more people talking in rooms than the physical act of escaping. It’s almost like this movie was made on half the budget of the previous film and they’re really bad at hiding it.
Escape from the Planet of the Apes feels like the first part of a much more exciting movie that for some reason was excised and put into theaters on its own. While it’s nice to see Roddy and Kim again this movie fails to either excite or enjoy, and with the haphazard way it came into being it’s a wonder why it should even exist at all, besides setting up a potentially more interesting film down the road, which after having seen this film reeks of unfounded confidence. Unless you’re a completionist or a film blogger there’s very little reason to turn on Escape from the Planet of the Apes, especially if it’s your only film of the evening. For everyone else, you’re much better off sticking with the original or Beneath this Halloween. Chimp-tested, gorilla-approved.
No comments:
Post a Comment